First thing out of the blocks, I want to say a sincere thank you to everyone that took the time to read my first ever ventures into the abyss that is known as blogging (I had to dip my toe into the water at some stage I suppose, and firing in 2 or 3 personal subjects seemed to get a good reaction and honest feedback from all y'all, so I say thank you again.
Ok....sentimental bus well and truly parked (for now,anyway)...
I'll bet you all (well maybe the musically learned among you) are wondering why an obscure (well, not to me...Wanted Dead Or Alive is such a great rock song..ok after a feed of stout,ANYTHING IS) 1986 Bon Jovi lyric is the centerpiece of this blog. Its certainly not due to me pulling out the hairspray and hair-metalling out to it, as my follically challenged cerebrum will testify to. Yes, Samson is in the house for that one. I digress though, as I picked that title as I may have to make a few alterations name-wise...or not name any names altogether!
You see, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away (thanks George), I worked in a certain computer factory in Limerick that starts with D and rhymes with a very bad place (opposite of Heaven, not Leitrim). I was there for a good ten and a half years (whats 6 months between friends) and God knows it was like the School of Life in there, as I encountered every possible character known to mankind in there. And I mean EVERY possible character. If Davina McCall wasnt doing Streetdate in Limerick that time, she shouldve called into us and she would have had unreal fodder for some show involving strangers all housed in under constant surveillance. I wonder did that idea ever get off the ground for her....
So now I'm sure ye are all saying...come on,tell us about these "unique individuals" that shared a work area with you. Ok you asked for it...(well I'm sure one of you did)....
Ever work with a guy who used to come in through the double doors of a factory floor,and the second he was in there he'd drop to his knees, do a "we're not worthy" salute and repeat a praising chant to the CEO of the company who was 14 gazillion (slight exaggeration) miles away in Texas? I did.
Ever work with a guy that wanted the canteen TO BE MOVED near to his line because it was "too long of a walk" for him. Keep in mind it was only a 60 second walk. I did.
Ever work with a guy that used to dip croissants into his bowl of custard (willingly)? I did.
Ever work with a guy that once asked a EMEA head honcho at a town hall meeting "Whats the story with the mice balls in the internet room? They're always getting robbed!" and who was later accusing people of being a "mice ball robber pervert"? I did. Oh, same guy came in at 8am one morning and by 8.10 he was asleep standing up. Felt sorry for the temp that was only there a week and had to get past him while this slumber was taking place! Lets just say that momentary slumber was less than pleasant for all concerned.
Ever work with a guy that would ask to have the obituaries printed off so he could go to all the funerals that evening for the free food in the pub after,regardless whether he knew the person or not? I did.
Ever work with a guy that once proposed to a line manager with a ring from a barm brack. And subsequently got suspended? I did.
Ever work with a guy that fired a tape gun at another operator while a tour from Belguim was going around the line? I did.
Ever work with a guy that fell asleep beside foam inserts one morning and when operators tried to lift him up they found a bottle of vodka in each pocket of his leather jacket weighing him down? I did.
Ever work with a girl who our line did this big collection for,and her leaving all teary eyed....only to come back three weeks later? I did.
Okay I think thats enough character assassination done for now! Although if ye are thirsty for more,I will see what repressed memories I can fester out and transfer them through the medium of blogging. This has been a more fun posting for me, as I have skitted laughing here and there at some of those anecdotes,and yes,every single one of them are true. That is a PG version, if I am being honest, which I am basically using as a way of talking on here. A little more than 140 characters here, granted, but ye will always get an honest tale of some kind. Thanks for reading and I hope you laughed at one or two of those summaries. I know I did.
No comments:
Post a Comment