Put it there or not

I dont't forgive easily.

I looked it up. A trait among Librans is one of "a defect of not knowing how to forgive their fellowmen". Well, if it's on the internet...then it MUST be true,right? I recently was able to put this theory into practice,by accident or fate or whatever you want to call it,in two different entities.

I'll go with the more enlightening one first. A few weeks ago in town, I was having a pint when I met the bar owner who just happened to be one of my old bosses.It was the first time I'd seen him in there,I'd been in the place a few times and always had fun there,but this was the first time I'd seen him since the place we both worked closed down three years ago. As my boss, this fella put me through the wringer. Majorly. He'd set you off on wild goose chases,often putting you in positions that you had next to no knowledge about,and then he'd wonder why production was stalling. In return,naturally,I cant keep my trap shut and I was quite vocal about the way he was running things,which led to constant back and forths. Just constant. And I wasn't the only one that felt this way. So for a finish,I suppose there was ill will there and I wasnt entirely guilt free in trying to be somebit professional about things,but when things arent being commandeered properly,it can only lead to derision from varied quarters. Bottom line, I was in the wrong too. Fast forward to 2012 and he comes over to where I'm sitting and extends his hand.I shake it and we have small talk about how things are. Not exactly awkward but it's fine. I see him the day after in town and we say hello. A small part of my soul is gone white.

Now you're thinking,happy ending and all is rosy in the garden,right? Well,in that case,yeah. Compare that to case study number two.

I get a add request or whatever they are called nowadays on Facebook from a former work colleague and that's being generous. This guy was and probably still is,a real piece of work. Now I'm no angel,but if I'm someone that has three kids by two different women,and I'm living with one of these women and kids,the first thing I probably wouldn't do is go off with an American flight attendant in a hotel bar. I kinda stayed away from his activities after that. Then,long after that, I get these phonecalls,from him,(note - if you are going to prank me,AT LEAST hide your number) asking me what time our Fás couirse starts at. Keep in mind we have never been in anything remotely resembling a classroom - especially considering when he is up the country. The the random text "well buddy are we going out?" Never have I been so tempted to write his number on the wall of a jacks somewhere. Just a complete oddball thats far better off left to his own devices.

Then there is myself. On getting a phonecall recently that I hadn't been successful for a job,I was fuming with myself. That was my first interview in two years. I'd been in there over and hour and was full sure I had it. I really was. Just complete and utter anger for the next few days after that. It took me a while to get over that,but it must be the same for so many others around the country. Pain in the hole,but what can ya do.

Bottom line - Sometimes you need to forgive yourself as much as forgiving others.